{"id":346,"date":"2020-03-20T15:25:28","date_gmt":"2020-03-20T15:25:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp\/?p=346"},"modified":"2020-03-20T15:25:28","modified_gmt":"2020-03-20T15:25:28","slug":"viss-ir-ka-tam-pienakas-but-vai-ta-ir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/raksti\/viss-ir-ka-tam-pienakas-but-vai-ta-ir\/","title":{"rendered":"Viss ir, k\u0101 tam pien\u0101kas b\u016bt, vai t\u0101 ir?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Pamela Kribe<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cT\u0101 bija paredz\u0113ts b\u016bt\u201d, \u201caiz t\u0101 j\u0101st\u0101v augst\u0101kai gribai\u201d, \u201cviss ir tie\u0161i t\u0101, k\u0101 tam ir paredz\u0113ts b\u016bt\u201d. Izteikumi viegli nor\u0101da gar\u012bgu noslieci. Bie\u017ei pazi\u0146ojumi, l\u012bdz\u012bgi \u0161iem, tiek izteikti, saskaroties ar situ\u0101cij\u0101m vai notikumiem, kuri liekas bezj\u0113dz\u012bgi, tra\u0123iski vai ne\u017e\u0113l\u012bgi. Nelaimes, slim\u012bbas, smagas neveiksmes uzliek mums taisn\u012bguma saj\u016btas testu. K\u0101p\u0113c tas notiek ar mani, k\u0101p\u0113c tam bija j\u0101notiek? Priek\u0161stats, ka aiz visa, kas notiek, st\u0101v augst\u0101ka k\u0101rt\u012bba, dievi\u0161\u0137a roka, kura zina lab\u0101k, ir nomierino\u0161a. Bet vai t\u0101 ir taisn\u012bba?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Doma, ka viss notiek t\u0101, k\u0101 tam pien\u0101kas notikt, ir deterministisks priek\u0161stats: tas nor\u0101da, ka ir augst\u0101ks sp\u0113ks, kur\u0161 nolemj, kas notiks m\u016bsu zemes dz\u012bv\u0113s. \u0160is augst\u0101kais sp\u0113ks var b\u016bt Dievs vai j\u016bsu dv\u0113sele jeb augst\u0101kais es. Neatkar\u012bgi no t\u0101 rado\u0161ais sp\u0113ks nepieder jums, bet \u0161im augst\u0101kajam avotam. Ideja, ka mums k\u0101 cilv\u0113cisk\u0101m b\u016btn\u0113m ir br\u012bva griba un m\u0113s varam izdar\u012bt br\u012bvas izv\u0113les, t\u0101dej\u0101di ir nopietni ap\u0161aub\u012bta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

T\u0101dej\u0101di rodas paradokss: raugoties no gar\u012bg\u0101 pasaules uzskata, liel\u0101k\u0101 da\u013ca cilv\u0113ku uzl\u016bko savu sp\u0113ku izdar\u012bt izv\u0113les un uz\u0146emties atbild\u012bbu par savu dz\u012bvi k\u0101 svar\u012bg\u0101ko tam, kas vi\u0146i ir. Ja \u0161\u012b sp\u0113ka neb\u016btu, viss priek\u0161stats par iek\u0161\u0113jo izaugsmi<\/em> un transform\u0101ciju<\/em> k\u013c\u016btu novecojis. Tai pat laik\u0101 past\u0101v apgalvojums, kur\u0161 bie\u017ei skan k\u0101 piesauk\u0161ana, ka \u201cviss ir, k\u0101 tam pien\u0101kas b\u016bt\u201d vai, citiem v\u0101rdiem, \u201cviss ir dievi\u0161\u0137\u0101 k\u0101rt\u012bb\u0101\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u0160\u012b \u201cpriec\u012bg\u0101 peld\u0113\u0161ana pa straumi\u201d, ka viss patie\u0161\u0101m<\/em> notiek, k\u0101 tas ir paredz\u0113ts, gan p\u0101rsteidz, gan kaitina mani. Pirmk\u0101rt, uz zemes ir masveida cie\u0161anas, kuras ir ac\u012bmredzamas p\u0113c acu uzme\u0161anas nejau\u0161am laikrakstam jebkuru dienu. Intens\u012bvas cie\u0161anas fiziskaj\u0101, emocion\u0101laj\u0101 un gar\u012bgaj\u0101 l\u012bmen\u012b ir daudzos, daudzos cilv\u0113kos, k\u0101 ar\u012b dab\u0101. T\u0101tad, k\u0101 ir \u2013 viss ir tie\u0161i t\u0101, k\u0101 tam pien\u0101kas b\u016bt?! Otrk\u0101rt, past\u0101v augst\u0101k min\u0113tais paradokss, ka br\u012bv\u0101 griba un iepriek\u0161nolemt\u012bba kop\u0101 labi nesader. \u0160o punktu ir v\u0113rts apsv\u0113rt, kad j\u016bs audzin\u0101t domu, ka viss ir labi un dievi\u0161\u0137\u0101 k\u0101rt\u012bb\u0101. Tre\u0161k\u0101rt, esmu nov\u0113rojusi, ka n\u0101k\u0161ana klaj\u0101 ar \u0161o ideju bie\u017ei iet kop\u0101 ar tipisku l\u012bdzj\u016bt\u012bbas piez\u012bmi, sava veida gar\u012bgu vis\u017e\u0113l\u012bgumu, izsakot ko taml\u012bdz\u012bgu: \u201cAk, b\u0113rns, es redzu, ka j\u016bs v\u0113l nesaprotat, k\u0101 j\u016bs esat no\u0137erta vis\u0101s p\u0101r\u0101k cilv\u0113cisk\u0101s \u0161aub\u0101s un noska\u0146\u0101s, un emocij\u0101s, bet patie\u0161\u0101m aiz visa, kas notiek, past\u0101v liel\u0101ka j\u0113ga, un k\u0101du dienu j\u016bs ar\u012b b\u016bsiet tam liecinieks.\u201d Cilv\u0113ki bie\u017ei v\u0113l labu, esmu p\u0101rliecin\u0101ta, bet tom\u0113r…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kad es tikko biju iz\u0101rst\u0113ta no smagas depresijas ar psihozes epizod\u0113m 2010. gad\u0101 un joproj\u0101m c\u012bn\u012bjos, lai sadz\u012bvotu ar \u0161o \u0161ausmino\u0161o pieredzi, k\u0101ds man teica: \u201cir diezgan skaidrs, ka jums bija j\u0101iziet caur to un ka t\u0101 m\u0113r\u0137is bija dot jums iesp\u0113ju tagad pal\u012bdz\u0113t cilv\u0113kiem ar l\u012bdz\u012bg\u0101m cie\u0161an\u0101m.\u201d Es nevar\u0113ju atbild\u0113t uz \u0161o nor\u0101d\u012bjumu, jo es spazmatiski elpoju, bet v\u0113l\u0101k es sapratu, ka tur faktiski tika izteikti tr\u012bs netie\u0161i nor\u0101d\u012bjumi: 1. Depresija bija iepriek\u0161 nolemta<\/em>, un es to nevar\u0113ju nov\u0113rst, 2. Tas notika manis pa\u0161as lab\u0101<\/em>, lai gan es jutos briesm\u012bgi, un 3. Aiz t\u0101 visa st\u0101v\u0113ja gar\u012bgs m\u0113r\u0137is<\/em> padar\u012bt mani par lab\u0101ku skolot\u0101ju un dziednieku citiem cilv\u0113kiem. P\u0113d\u0113jais nor\u0101d\u012bjums t\u016bl\u012bt nol\u0113ma mani mokpilnai dz\u012bvei. Tas, kas paties\u012bb\u0101<\/em> bija noticis, bija tas, ka es ziedoju sevi un izg\u0101ju caur elli citu gl\u0101b\u0161anai. Ak. Glaimojo\u0161s veids tikt noliktam uz taml\u012bdz\u012bga pjedest\u0101la, bet man ir aizdomas, ka tam ir nestabils l\u012bdzsvars.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tas, kas izriet no visiem trim nor\u0101d\u012bjumiem, ir liel\u0101 starp\u012bba starp to, k\u0101 es izjutu notiku\u0161o, un \u201cfaktisko\u201d gar\u012bgo paties\u012bbu. Kas man lik\u0101s patie\u0161\u0101m slikts, \u201cpaties\u012bb\u0101\u201d bija laba lieta, tas, k\u0101 liel\u0101ko da\u013cu es b\u016btu v\u0113l\u0113jusies nov\u0113rst, \u201cpaties\u012bb\u0101\u201d bija iepriek\u0161 nolemts un tas, ko es pieredz\u0113ju k\u0101 savu person\u012bgo p\u0101rdz\u012bvojumu depresijas laik\u0101, \u201cpaties\u012bb\u0101\u201d bija kaut kas, ko es uz\u0146\u0113mos, lai k\u013c\u016btu lab\u0101ka skolot\u0101ja citiem. Dusmas, gr\u016btsird\u012bba un izbailes, kuras es jutu p\u0113c t\u0101, kas ar mani bija noticis, bija vienk\u0101r\u0161i mana ego, kur\u0161 nevar padoties lietu augst\u0101kai k\u0101rt\u012bbai, l\u012bklo\u010di. \u0160is piem\u0113rs par\u0101da visp\u0101r\u012bgo argument\u0101ciju, kuru var piem\u0113rot daudz\u0101m da\u017e\u0101d\u0101m situ\u0101cij\u0101m. Visp\u0101r\u0113j\u0101 tendence ir paskat\u012bties uz notikumu vai situ\u0101ciju, kura pirmaj\u0101 acu uzmetien\u0101 \u0161\u0137iet briesm\u012bga, tra\u0123iska vai absurda, un tad nogludin\u0101t to ar gar\u012bgu principu, ka \u201clietas vienm\u0113r ir tie\u0161i t\u0101das, k\u0101d\u0101m t\u0101m pien\u0101kas b\u016bt\u201d vai \u201cdievi\u0161\u0137\u0101 k\u0101rt\u012bba regul\u0113 notikumus, t\u0101p\u0113c dzi\u013c\u0101k\u0101 l\u012bmen\u012b viss ir labi\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ko dar\u012bt ar \u0161o tipisko nogludin\u0101\u0161anas pieeju? Priek\u0161stats, ka viss ir iepriek\u0161 nolemts un att\u012bst\u0101s saska\u0146\u0101 ar dievi\u0161\u0137o gribu, nevar tikt atsp\u0113kots uz lo\u0123iska pamata. T\u0101 ir neapstr\u012bdama metafiziska pras\u012bba, kuru nevar apg\u0101zt (vai pier\u0101d\u012bt!) ar emp\u012brisku liecin\u0101jumu. Tom\u0113r t\u0101 ir pretrun\u0101 ar m\u016bsu dzi\u013ci saj\u016btamo izj\u016btu, ka m\u0113s varam ietekm\u0113t savas dz\u012bves, ka mums ir br\u012bv\u0101 griba un ties\u012bbas izv\u0113l\u0113ties. Priek\u0161stats, ka \u201cviss ir labi, k\u0101 tas ir\u201d vai \u201cviss ir, k\u0101 tam paredz\u0113ts b\u016bt\u201d ir pretrun\u0101 ar to, k\u0101 m\u0113s j\u016btamies ikdienas dz\u012bv\u0113. Ikreiz, kad gar\u012bgs princips ir klaj\u0101 pretrun\u0101 ar veselo sapr\u0101tu, ar m\u016bsu ikdienas iek\u0161\u0113j\u0101m saj\u016bt\u0101m, tas priek\u0161 manis pace\u013c sarkanu karogu. Es uzskatu, ka patiess gar\u012bgums ir piln\u012bgi sader\u012bgs ar m\u016bsu dabiskajiem instinktiem un intu\u012bciju. V\u0113l vair\u0101k, es uzskatu, ka, pateicoties m\u016bsu saj\u016btu dabai<\/em>, m\u0113s varam savienoties ar m\u016bsu dv\u0113sel\u0113m. Vair\u0101k nek\u0101 pr\u0101ts un ideolo\u0123ijas, kas to dara, ir sirds, m\u016bsu j\u016btu un intu\u012bcijas m\u0101jvieta, kura veido ce\u013cu uz gar\u012bgo paties\u012bbu. Ja past\u0101v liela at\u0161\u0137ir\u012bba starp to, ko j\u016bs j\u016btat k\u0101 patiesi labu un patiesu, un to, ko gar\u012bga m\u0101c\u012bba atkl\u0101j k\u0101 labu un patiesu, es vienm\u0113r par pareizu krit\u0113riju izv\u0113l\u0113tos cilv\u0113ka saj\u016btu. Un pa\u0161apmierin\u0101t\u0101 p\u0101r\u0101kuma gaisotne, k\u0101d\u0101 bie\u017ei tiek izteiktas par murgain\u0101m uzskat\u0101mas gar\u012bgas pras\u012bbas, ar\u012b nepal\u012bdz.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bet ko tad? Ja lietas nav iepriek\u0161 nolemtas, ja nepast\u0101v augst\u0101ka j\u0113ga aiz visa, kas notiek, vai tad dz\u012bve ir t\u012bra sakrit\u012bbas sp\u0113le? Vai tur nav liel\u0101ks st\u0101sts, nav j\u0113ga tam visam? Un ja tas viss ir br\u012bvs un atv\u0113rts, un j\u016bs joproj\u0101m ticat Dievam, k\u0101p\u0113c Dievs pie\u013cauj tik daudz s\u0101pju un cie\u0161anu, k\u0101ds tam b\u016btu izskaidrojums? Es grib\u0113tu apgalvot, ka past\u0101v gar\u012bgi noz\u012bm\u012bgi c\u0113lo\u0146i, k\u0101p\u0113c lietas notiek t\u0101, k\u0101 t\u0101s notiek, bet tas nenoz\u012bm\u0113, ka tas, kas notiek, ir labi un pareizi. C\u0113lonis ir visam, bet tas nenoz\u012bm\u0113, ka tam b\u016btu<\/em> j\u0101notiek. Es apgalvoju, ka ir at\u0161\u0137ir\u012bba starp atz\u012b\u0161anu, ka notieko\u0161ie notikumi ir pak\u013cauti gar\u012bgai lo\u0123ikai, un tic\u012bbu iepriek\u0161nolemt\u012bbai. Patie\u0161\u0101m past\u0101v gar\u012bgi likumi, kuri darbojas j\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113s, ta\u010du tie nav pretrun\u0101 ar m\u016bsu br\u012bvo gribu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lai preciz\u0113tu, ko es dom\u0101ju, piem\u0113rosim to augst\u0101k min\u0113tajam piem\u0113ram. Manu depresiju skaidri izrais\u012bja bailes un negat\u012bvi uzskati man\u0101 iek\u0161ien\u0113. Es uzskatu, ka tas pieder manas dv\u0113seles m\u0113r\u0137im \u2013 k\u0101d\u0101 br\u012bd\u012b iznest \u0161\u012bs bailes un negat\u012bvos uzskatus manas apzin\u0101\u0161an\u0101s virspus\u0113, lai tie var\u0113tu tikt dziedin\u0101ti. Bet tas nenoz\u012bm\u0113, ka visam bija j\u0101notiek tie\u0161i t\u0101, k\u0101 tas notika, vai ka man nebija citas izv\u0113les taj\u0101, kas atkl\u0101jies man\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113. Es skaidri atceros, ka, pirms depresija mana re\u0101li sagr\u0101ba (un man bija j\u0101iet slimn\u012bc\u0101), es sa\u0146\u0113mu vair\u0101kus sign\u0101lus, \u012bpa\u0161i no mana \u0137erme\u0146a, kas r\u0101d\u012bja man, ka esmu liel\u0101 stres\u0101 un ka man vajadz\u0113tu piebremz\u0113t. Man neizdev\u0101s to re\u0101li izdar\u012bt, un tas nebija iepriek\u0161 nolemts. Faktam, ka es ner\u012bkojos p\u0113c sav\u0101m intuit\u012bvaj\u0101m nojausm\u0101m un \u0137erme\u0146a sign\u0101liem, ir izskaidrojums: man bija bail pievilt, bail teikt cilv\u0113kiem \u2018n\u0113\u2019, jo es augsti v\u0113rt\u0113ju vi\u0146u atzin\u012bbu un baid\u012bjos no atraid\u012bjuma. Tas izskaidro, k\u0101p\u0113c es laic\u012bgi nenobremz\u0113ju, tom\u0113r, kaut ar\u012b past\u0101v\u0113ja noteikti iemesli, t\u0101 joproj\u0101m bija mana izv\u0113le. Pats fakts, ka man bija zin\u0101ms<\/em> par \u0161iem sign\u0101liem un nojaut\u0101m, liecina, ka past\u0101v izv\u0113les iesp\u0113ja.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

T\u0101tad, k\u0101 tagad redzams, es izdar\u012bju da\u017eas sliktas izv\u0113les. Tagad nav tur daudz ko bezgal\u012bgi vainot sevi, ka pag\u0101tn\u0113 izdar\u012btas maz\u0101k veiksm\u012bgs izv\u0113les. P\u0101rme\u0161ana sev skarb\u0101 veid\u0101 rada vainas saj\u016btu, kura ir destrukt\u012bva un nelietder\u012bga (es \u0161eit run\u0101ju no person\u012bg\u0101s pieredzes). Nosod\u012bt sevi nav sevi\u0161\u0137i der\u012bgi. Tom\u0113r teikt, ka es nevar\u0113tu neko l\u012bdz\u0113t, jo tam bija paredz\u0113ts notikt<\/em>, ir non\u0101kt otr\u0101 gal\u0113j\u012bb\u0101; tas ir absol\u016bts noliegums. Nav runa par faktu, ka es b\u016btu var\u0113jusi izdar\u012bt citas izv\u0113les. Lab\u0101kais veids, k\u0101 atskat\u012bties uz to, ir ar l\u012bdzj\u016bt\u012bbas un maiguma ac\u012bm. J\u016btot l\u012bdzj\u016bt\u012bbu pret sevi, j\u016bs apliecin\u0101t, ka j\u016bs esat k\u013c\u016bd\u012bties sp\u0113j\u012bga cilv\u0113ciska b\u016btne, un k\u013c\u016bst viegl\u0101k m\u0101c\u012bties no sav\u0101m k\u013c\u016bd\u0101m. Ja j\u016bs sp\u0113jat piedot sev, j\u016bs varat noraudz\u012bties uz pag\u0101tnes k\u013c\u016bd\u0101m k\u0101 uz j\u0113gpiln\u0101m m\u0101c\u012bb\u0101m, kuras ir \u013c\u0101vu\u0161as jums nok\u013c\u016bt iek\u0161ien\u0113 un izdar\u012bt lab\u0101kas izv\u0113les n\u0101kotn\u0113. T\u0101d\u0101 veid\u0101 tra\u0123iskas situ\u0101cijas var k\u013c\u016bt<\/em> m\u0113r\u0137tiec\u012bgas un j\u0113gpilnas, nevis t\u0101p\u0113c, ka t\u0101s p\u0113c b\u016bt\u012bbas ir labas vai v\u0113lamas (t\u0101s bie\u017ei t\u0101das nav), bet t\u0101p\u0113c, ka j\u016bs esat gatavi m\u0101c\u012bties no t\u0101m un pat transform\u0113ties no t\u0101m. T\u0101dej\u0101di, to, vai kaut kas ir gar\u012bgi j\u0113gpilns, nenosaka pa\u0161i objekt\u012bvie notikumi, bet veids, k\u0101 j\u016bs tos pieredzat un interpret\u0113jat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

T\u0101d\u0101 veid\u0101 br\u012bvo gribu un zin\u0101mas pak\u0101pes iepriek\u0161nolemt\u012bbu var saska\u0146ot. Iedom\u0101jieties, ka j\u016bsu dv\u0113sele \u0161aj\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113 v\u0113l\u0113j\u0101s dz\u012bvot ar zin\u0101mu pieredzi. Tas ir iemesls, k\u0101p\u0113c j\u016bsu dv\u0113sele izv\u0113l\u0113j\u0101s sadurties ar noteikt\u0101m probl\u0113m\u0101m, kuras sav\u0101 veid\u0101 bija ieprogramm\u0113tas j\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113. Zin\u0101mi cilv\u0113ki, kurus j\u016bs sastopat, da\u017e\u0101das izdev\u012bbas vai neveiksmes, kas n\u0101k j\u016bsu ce\u013c\u0101, patie\u0161\u0101m var b\u016bt iepriek\u0161 noteiktas. Tom\u0113r galvenais jaut\u0101jums ir, k\u0101 j\u016bs, cilv\u0113ks ar br\u012bvo izv\u0113li, rea\u0123\u0113siet uz \u0161iem satiktajiem un situ\u0101cij\u0101m un cik liel\u0101 m\u0113r\u0101 j\u016bs atkl\u0101siet m\u0113r\u0137i un j\u0113gu taj\u0101, kas ar jums notiek. Tas nav noteikts, un tas ir j\u016bsu dv\u0113seles galvenais m\u0113r\u0137is \u2013 pie\u0146emt probl\u0113m\u0101s ietvert\u0101s m\u0101c\u012bbas ar m\u012blest\u012bbu un pie\u0146em\u0161anu. T\u0101d\u0101 veid\u0101 j\u016bs n\u0101kotn\u0113 izdar\u012bsiet cit\u0101das izv\u0113les un piesaist\u012bsiet vair\u0101k pozit\u012bvu tik\u0161anos un situ\u0101ciju sav\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113, nov\u0113r\u0161ot nepiecie\u0161am\u012bbu saskarties ar t\u0101m pa\u0161\u0101m probl\u0113m\u0101m atkal un atkal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bie\u017ei vien ir \u013coti gr\u016bti atbild\u0113t dz\u012bves nopietn\u0101kajiem izaicin\u0101jumiem ar uztic\u0113\u0161anos un pie\u0146em\u0161anu. T\u0101p\u0113c es saku, ka tas ir j\u016bsu dv\u0113seles galvenais m\u0113r\u0137is. Bie\u017ei vien t\u0101 ir milz\u012bga c\u012b\u0146a \u2013 atrast v\u0113rt\u012bbu dzi\u013cai pieredzei ar zaud\u0113jumu vai s\u0101p\u0113m, vai noraid\u012bjumu. Preto\u0161an\u0101s un izmisums \u2013 tas ir norm\u0101li un \u013coti cilv\u0113c\u012bgi. Bet es uzskatu, ka tas ir m\u016bsu dv\u0113seles dzi\u013c\u0101kais uzaicin\u0101jums mums: apkampt pat pa\u0161u tum\u0161\u0101ko da\u013cu m\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113s un sev\u012b pa\u0161os ar sapratni un siltumu, ne t\u0101p\u0113c, ka tas ir \u201clabi, k\u0101 tas ir\u201d, bet t\u0101p\u0113c, ka akcept\u0113t un str\u0101d\u0101t ar vi\u0146u ir vien\u012bg\u0101 izeja. Tas ir vien\u012bgais ce\u013c\u0161 uz gaismu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kad es biju ap vidu man\u0101 psihotiskaj\u0101 depresij\u0101, es nepieredz\u0113ju nek\u0101du j\u0113gu vai saj\u016btu, caur ko es eju. Maniem m\u012b\u013cajiem tas ar\u012b bija murgs. Mani galu gal\u0101 ievietoja psihiatriskaj\u0101 slimn\u012bc\u0101 pret pa\u0161as gribu. Mana atvese\u013co\u0161an\u0101s s\u0101k\u0101s tur. Kad biju izvese\u013cojusies, es uzzin\u0101ju, k\u0101 tas ir, kad dzi\u013cas cie\u0161anas nes aug\u013cus. Tikl\u012bdz es pagriezos pret gaismu un atkal v\u0113l\u0113jos dz\u012bvot, es piedz\u012bvoju dzi\u013cu prieku un iepazinu p\u0101rpiln\u012bbu man\u0101 dz\u012bv\u0113 k\u0101 nekad agr\u0101k. Ko pirmk\u0101rt var uzskat\u012bt k\u0101 pa\u0161saprotamu, rad\u0101s br\u012bnuma un dzi\u013cas pateic\u012bbas avots. Da\u017ereiz, atgrie\u017eoties ar p\u0101rtikas prec\u0113m, man grib\u0113j\u0101s nost\u0101ties manas m\u0101jas priek\u0161\u0101 un tikai pabr\u012bn\u012bties par faktu, ka \u0161eit man ir vieta uz zemes, kur es varu dz\u012bvot ar diviem man vism\u012b\u013c\u0101kajiem cilv\u0113kiem, manu v\u012bru un meitu. Es biju p\u0101rsteigta par patiesaj\u0101m r\u016bp\u0113m un atbalstu, ko man deva cilv\u0113ki ap mani, kas agr\u0101k bija pazi\u0146as, tagad k\u013cuva par tuviem draugiem. Ne tikai piln\u012bgu sabrukumu, \u0161\u012b psihoze dod man jaunu izpratni pat to, ko pirms tam uzskat\u012bju par pa\u0161saprotamu, t\u0101 man deva ar\u012b stabilu atkl\u0101smi, kura tagad pal\u012bdz man dz\u012bvot manu dz\u012bvi ar maz\u0101k\u0101m bail\u0113m un liel\u0101ku piepild\u012bjumu. P\u0113c p\u0101ris gadiem es uzrakst\u012bju gr\u0101matu par manas dv\u0113seles tum\u0161o nakti, kura pal\u012bdz\u0113ja man piln\u012bg\u0101k integr\u0113t visu pieredzi, kad viegl\u0101k raudz\u012bties uz notiku\u0161o. P\u0113c \u0161\u012bs gr\u0101matas public\u0113\u0161anas (holandie\u0161u valod\u0101 \u2013 ceru public\u0113t to angliski \u0161\u012b gada beig\u0101s) man n\u0101ca v\u0113stules no cilv\u0113kiem, kuri atpazina sevi man\u0101 st\u0101st\u0101 un jut\u0101s t\u0101 atbalst\u012bti un mierin\u0101ti. T\u0101dej\u0101di, mana dv\u0113seles tum\u0161\u0101 nakts ieguva noz\u012bmi. Pak\u0101peniski \u0161\u012b \u0161ausmino\u0161\u0101 pieredze par\u0101d\u0101s cit\u0101 gaism\u0101, dziedino\u0161\u0101 un j\u0113gpiln\u0101 gaism\u0101. Tom\u0113r tas nenoz\u012bm\u0113, ka tam bija \u201cparedz\u0113ts notikt\u201d vai ka t\u0101 \u201cpaties\u012bb\u0101\u201d bija laba lieta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Viss ir t\u0101, k\u0101 tam pien\u0101kas b\u016bt? Viss ir labi, k\u0101 tas ir? N\u0113! Uz zemes ir daudz cie\u0161anu un tra\u0123\u0113diju. Es uzskatu, ka m\u0113s m\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113s piesaist\u0101m da\u017eas negat\u012bvas situ\u0101cijas, lai apzin\u0101tos negat\u012bvismu m\u016bsu iek\u0161ien\u0113 (dusmas, bailes, neuztic\u0113\u0161anos). \u0160\u012bs situ\u0101cijas var b\u016bt da\u013c\u0113ji iepriek\u0161 izk\u0101rtotas. Bet aiz \u0161im probl\u0113m\u0101m st\u0101v m\u0113r\u0137is, ka m\u0113s izdar\u0101m cit\u0101das izv\u0113les n\u0101kotn\u0113, lai \u013cautu aiziet negat\u012bvismam un p\u0101rtrauktu to piesaist\u012bt sav\u0101s dz\u012bv\u0113s. S\u0101p\u012bgs vai tra\u0123isks notikums nav p\u0113c b\u016bt\u012bbas labs vai v\u0113rt\u012bgs, tas t\u0101ds k\u013c\u016bst tikai tad, kad cilv\u0113kam ir drosme un pr\u0101ta skaidr\u012bba, lai atrastu taj\u0101 j\u0113gu un transform\u0113tos no t\u0101. Mums ir izv\u0113le, k\u0101 rea\u0123\u0113t uz \u201cto, kas ir\u201d. Mums ir potenci\u0101ls, lai transform\u0113tu negat\u012bvismu un s\u0101pes caur m\u016bsu iek\u0161\u0113jo attieksmi un padar\u012btu dz\u012bvi gai\u0161\u0101ku un priec\u012bgu sev pa\u0161iem un citiem. Tas ir gar\u012bguma patiesais m\u0113r\u0137is. Augst\u0101k\u0101 k\u0101rt\u012bba, kuru m\u0113s tik izmis\u012bgi mekl\u0113jam aiz \u0101r\u0113jiem notikumiem m\u016bsu dz\u012bv\u0113s, neatrodas \u0101rpus mums. Mums vajag to rad\u012bt m\u016bsos pa\u0161os: t\u0101 ir m\u016bsu k\u0101 br\u012bvu Dieva b\u0113rnu misija.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

www.jeshua.net<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00a9 Pamela Kribbe 2014<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tulkoja J\u0101nis Oppe<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Pamela Kribe \u201cT\u0101 bija paredz\u0113ts b\u016bt\u201d, \u201caiz t\u0101 j\u0101st\u0101v augst\u0101kai gribai\u201d, \u201cviss ir tie\u0161i t\u0101, k\u0101 tam ir paredz\u0113ts b\u016bt\u201d. Izteikumi viegli nor\u0101da gar\u012bgu noslieci. Bie\u017ei pazi\u0146ojumi, l\u012bdz\u012bgi \u0161iem, tiek izteikti, saskaroties ar situ\u0101cij\u0101m vai notikumiem, kuri liekas bezj\u0113dz\u012bgi, tra\u0123iski vai ne\u017e\u0113l\u012bgi. Nelaimes, slim\u012bbas, smagas neveiksmes uzliek mums taisn\u012bguma saj\u016btas testu. K\u0101p\u0113c tas notiek…<\/p>\n

Read More Read More<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-346","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-raksti"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/346","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=346"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/346\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":347,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/346\/revisions\/347"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=346"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=346"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jeshua.net\/lv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=346"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}